I'm Ready

"I'm on the verge, I'm on the verge

Unraveling with every word

With every word you say, make me believe

That I won't feel your tires on the street

As I'm finding the words... you're getting away"

-Jack's Mannequin, I'm Ready

I'm going to start this out with "Things I've wanted to tweet today, but haven't because I'm afraid my followers will get annoyed".

• I hate getting stuck behind the Edmond train, but the sound is comforting like freshman yr.
• Runners go to Panera Saturday mornings - I like to go and act like I fit in.
• I have an uncanny habit of liking bands far too late after they're popular - DCFC, Killers, Jack's Mannequin
• I love when I get in my car the first time after I clean it.
• I wish I could ride my bike along the beach today.
• Spring is always a really productive season for me.

Last night I went out with my little Kaylie - I haven't laughed that hard in a long time. I'm really thankful that I have friends like her. I didn't get that much sleep last night, but I woke up early and did day 4 of Couch to 5k. Then I hopped over to Panera for an Asiago Cheese Bagel and now I came back to my house and took a nap before getting ready for work tonight. How exciting, right?

Here's the reason for the Jack's quote: My life really is about to change dramatically - new job, new place to live, new church, new outlook on life, eating better and actually exercising - I almost feel like I'm graduating all over again.

There's a small part of me that's scared out of my mind, but the majority of me is ready to be there already.

I'm tired of waiting tables, I'm tired of feeling hungover, I'm tired of unhealthy habits and relationships, and I'm ready for some new things in my life. But actually getting rid of the old stuff is a lot harder than I thought it would be. There's comfort in those things, or else I don't think I would have been so attached in the first place.

It's hard to let go of those things that made me happy for a long time - or at least distracted me from myself- but I think I'm ready.

"I am aware, I've been misled

I disconnect my heart, my head

Don't wanna recognize when things go bad

The things that you'll accept

Except that I am finding the words... to say

I'm ready"

Mal xoxo